Of names without vowels


A report originally posted on ABS-CBN News of two infants in Mindanao whose names have absolutely no vowels in them—that is, if you don’t consider ‘y’ as a vowel—has elicited a range of reactions from amusement to anger.

How do you even pronounce them? asked one of many tweeters.

How, indeed, does one enunciate with ease Strygwyr Drytch Bryl (surnamed Bacolod), the name of an almost six-month-old child born in Davao City? Or that of newborn Glhynnyl Hylhyr Yzzyghyl (last name Buscato) from Carmen, Cotabato City?

Another tweeter, Sir-floats-a-lot (@oj_arbolario) commented, “Sumasagot na sa test mga classmate nila, sila sulat pa rin pangalan… [While their classmates are already answering the test, they are still writing their names…].”

One can imagine the unnecessary amount of time needed to spell out and inscribe those appellations. On the other hand, they can be utilized as passwords for those looking for ones that are hard to hack but so easy to reference in case one forgets.

According to the mother of SDB Bacolod, the infant’s first name was taken from a character in DOTA or Defense of the Ancients, a multiplayer pc game, but they decided to affix the other two…because why not, right?

The naming of weeks-old GHY Buscato, on the other hand, followed a more traditional route—the name has letters picked from those of the parents and the grandparents— but the name-giver inexplicably detoured to a path less traveled and ended up picking nothing but consonants.

One tweeter, Kathrine (@kitkathclub), said, “From someone who experienced perpetual incidence of misspelled name: this is RUTHLESS in every way, shape, and form.”

(We feel your pain, Catherine.)

Yet another (@nthebeningging) agreed, saying, “Kawawang bata pinahirapan sa pangalan baka maging tampulan pa ng tukso sa eskwela..tsk [Poor child. Given a hard time with a name like that and might end up bullied in school…tsk].”

Of course, some people found humor in all this.

“Welsh ang peg?” said @IANVARIVS while @SammieDoggie said, “Can I buy a vowel?”, an oft-repeated request in the popular American television game show Wheel of Fortune.

Tweeter Joseph (@joseph0686UK) queried, “Lasing ba ang mga magulang neto noong binigay nila pangalan [Were the parents drunk when they named their kids]?”

(Joseph is rightfully perplexed; his parents were obviously sober when they chose his name.)

Oh, well, at least those of us who have standard names with sufficient vowels can rest easy at night knowing that our names do not provoke discourse or infuriate others.

Levity aside, we wish Strygwyr Drytch Bryl and Glhynnyl Hylhyr Yzzyghyl good, healthy lives ahead of them. May they grow up to become more famous than they already are.

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